The Expansive Present
LATELY, I’VE BEEN thinking about self-talk—the conversations I have in my own mind. At times, I cringe when I think of past mistakes. I slip into doubt as I worry about an uncertain future. When it comes to money, my fears swell and billow when I least expect it, and even now, negative self-talk creeps in. In the past two years or so, I’ve learned to be with all of it—my body, my mind, my spirit, and my tender emotions.
Slowly, I’m learning that I don’t have to fight, ignore, or push away my negative thoughts. I can just pause and notice what I’m feeling in my body. This is why I love somatic work. It gives me a break from the mental chatter. At times, I take a deep breath, drop my shoulders, and ask simply, “What am I feeling in my body right now?” I notice where I feel tension and where I feel relaxed. Each sensation morphs and travels as I place my attention on it.
I might say, “Hi, body. What do you need?” Then, I adjust the temperature in the room or put on a snuggly sweater. I might stretch my arms to the side, breathe deeply, make some tea, or sway my hips to music I love. I may sit for a moment and gently rest my hand on my belly, or forehead, or chest. I remember that I have a body.
When I do this practice, the present moment expands, and I move more deeply into my awareness of right now. In the expansive present, I am fully alive. I may experience a moment of ease, or hopefulness, or grief. I make room for whatever I’m feeling in the moment. In doing so, I am building greater capacity for all of life. I am neither bracing against the future or mired in the past. When I’m with my body, I’m just…with my body. In that moment, the chatter subsides.
Self-talk is part of being human; it’s part of being alive. Interestingly, we can use our awareness of our inner chatter as an invitation to stop, breathe, and notice. So, the next time you become aware of your own self-talk, especially if it’s harsh or negative (for example, “Why is this happening? I can’t believe I did this. Here I am again. Things will never change…”), take a breath. Just pause. Don’t argue, berate yourself, or work overtime to talk yourself out of the negative thoughts. Just breathe. Then say, “Hi, body.” Put your attention on your jaw, shoulders, hands, knees—anywhere you feel something. Notice where you feel tension. Notice where you feel relaxed. Sit with your body, just for a moment. This is the beginning of somatic awareness. When we reconnect with our bodies, we return to the expansive present.
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